Happy Halloween, everyone in the blogosphere! Did you dress up? Trick or treat? Party hardy?
Me, I worked all weekend, so no partying. And it’s socially unacceptable for an adult to trick or treat without a child in tow, so I didn’t do that.
But I did dress up, and I technically handed out candy – at my workplace. Every year downtown, the DVA (Downtown Vernon Association) hosts a trick or treat trail: where businesses put balloons in front of their stores marking them as part of the trail, and they give out candy and fliers and stuff to kids who come in dressed up. So, I dressed up, went to work, and handed out candy to the wee ones who came in. It was so cute, and so much fun.
And who, you may ask, did I dress up as this year? You may remember I was William Wallace last year, and I have a penchant for being people, not things.
Well, this year, I was the immortal no, wait, that’s not right Amy Winehouse!
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I went from a bespectacled bottle redhead with an overgrown pixie cut to… that. Obscenely caked on makeup (which was soo hard to do, actually), so much red lipstick it almost turned plum, a long t-shirt, leggings, belt, tall boots. Gnarly black wig that Bethany and I mutated into a beehive and stuck a wire dragonfly in (we couldn’t find any fake flowers in my house, so it worked as a decoration). I have a tattoo on my arm, which you can almost see in the first image, and I just need a few more to make the ensemble complete. So I drew her anchor and lightning bolt, the latter of which you can’t see, in Sharpie. No moar, I’m right-handed, fuck that shit. I have an in with my optometrist, so I got free one-day disposable contacts too :3 Except, because my glasses are chronically loose/crooked, I have a tic of adjusting them, so I’ve poked myself in the eye at least three times today.
I got some of the best reactions ever. It’s in my top three favourite Halloween costumes.
- Pregnant nun, circa 2009. Controversial, ridiculously fun – and when I took off the habit, I looked like a heavily pregnant teen. People stared.
- Amy Winehouse, circa 2011. This will be further explained uno momento.
- William Wallace, circa 2010. People expected me to moon the school during the costume contest, à la Braveheart. I should have.
- A mother: “Say, ‘Thank you, Amy Winehouse’.”
- Several mothers, loitering just outside the storefront: “It’s Amy Winehouse!” “It is? Oh, cool!” “She looks too sober. And alive.”
- A mother, whose English seemed a little rusty: “Oh, my God! It’s Amy Winehouse!” and proceeds to laugh and get too excited about the whole thing.
- A mother, as I give her child candy: “Aren’t you supposed to be dead?” Me, being a smartass: “Yeah. It’s all just a ruse.”
- A mother and her friends, loitering just outside the storefront: “It’s Amy Winehouse!” “Maybe ten years ago.”
- A mother, as I give her child candy: “You look pretty good for a dead girl.” Me, having not thought up a reaction to this: “Right?!”
- A customer, as I show her to the computer magazines: “You must be having a lot of fun with this.” Me, being totally honest: “Yeah. It’s actually a lot of fun being a dead celebrity.”
- A customer, staring at me as I straighten shelves after the trick or treat trail is over: “-thinking face- AMY WINEHOUSE!” Me, laughing and a little weirded out: “Exactly!”
- This same customer, looking for a book a little later: “Hey, Amy, do you happen to have Mordecai Richler’s biography?” Me, newly responding to a name that is not even close to mine, “Yeah, I think so.”
JP Marshman 
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