I figure I owe you, my one true love
other than James and cats and potatoes an explanation for my extended absence without leave from this, my blog. I haven’t even been very active elsewhere, but here has suffered the most.
If you haven’t noticed, I haven’t been around much since May, and even before then. The reason is simple. For the past year or so, I have been suffering, more so than usual, from depression and anxiety. In the spring of this year, it got to the point where I was no longer able to cope on my own, and I took a medical leave from work (and basically the whole world) so I didn’t collapse on myself.
Things hadn’t been good in my life, aside from my partner and my friends. It grew worse in the summer when I lost my best friend, my beautiful cat Vinny, to cancer.
In the time I’ve been away from the world, I’ve been working on getting myself better, and aside from a few points, I can say this is the least depressed and anxious I’ve been in a while. I think these are things that are going to be part of me for the rest of my life – especially the anxiety – but I’m slowly learning how to cope and heal.
If there’s one thing I can say, it’s that, if you’re feeling in any way depressed, anxious, or too stressed out, take the time you need for you. Your relationship with yourself is the longest, most rewarding relationship you will ever have. Cherish it and treasure it, and make sure you are healthy and happy, inside and out.
This isn’t worth the agony for all involved, so please take care of yourself first.
And now that I’m feeling better, I hope I’ll be around more often. For now, I’m going to colour a cat line art book with my 96 pack of crayons and watch Cinderella.